Dr. Kalgary's wedding makes Francine start to yearn for more family time, so Hayley suggests she look up her birth parents' information, although she brings home a house full of infants instead. Returning to the agency, she gets her birth parents' phone number and is invited to a family reunion. There, she finds that her birth mother has already passed and she comes under suspicion of being a gold digger by cousin Janet while Hayley hangs out with Roger who is posing as Nicholas' cat. But when her family wants to leave, she refuses so they take off without her.
With the family together, Nicholas turns his anger about their using their own wi-fi instead of connecting to the home network into a fight to the death, with the intention of leaving only a single surviving family member. As Francine tries to stay alive, she remembers that she isn't on the family account, but when she tries to call Stan, her phone is snatched by a youngster who takes off with it. She bumps into Roger who is hunting for the good cat food. She is nearly cornered, but an allergy to cats allows Roger to turn the tables on the would-be killer. When she tries to talk sense into the surviving family members, she is saved by cousin Janet from a barrage of death.
Meanwhile, Stan meets one of the stars of American Pickers at the wedding and decides to quit his job and adopt the picker's lifestyle, removing items such as copper wiring from Greg's home and uses the family reunion with Francine to scope out Nicholas' possessions. After they leave Francine behind and her phone is taken, Stan gets a notice that she is about to go over her data limit due to the youthful thief playing games. Puzzled as she never used that much data before, Stan calls and nearly exposes the youngster, who gets the drop on his would-be killer first. Answering, he informs Stan that Francine has probably been killed and they frantically return to the mansion. Francine and Janet's bloody bodies are thrown onto a pile of remains by the sole survivor, but just as he announces his victory, Stan's SUV leaps the hedge and smashes him flat. As Nicholas laments over losing everyone in the family and Stan cries over Francine, she reveals that she and Janet used makeup to pass for dead. With the car smashed, Hayley puzzles over how they will get home, but Stan spies a barn on the property and using his picker skills, they ride off on vintage Indian motorcycles. Nicholas is left with Roger as his cat, but when he takes out a can of wet cat food and starts to eat it himself, Roger starts to give up the gig. When Nicholas notes that he appears to be shedding badly, he offers to put Roger back on the wet food as well.