- British Agent: I have had sex with a lot of women, and I can tell you that you... should probably get tested.
- Stan: OW! What the hell? Wait...you're a gun? I always thought you were an eyeball or something! Douche.
- Stan: Dang... no tunes!
- Stan: You told me you'd tell me if you became a robot! You broke a pinkie promise!
- Stan: Beer, shaken, not stirred.
- Stan: The name is Smith, Stan Smith.
- Tearjerker: Didn't ask your name but okay.
- Robotic Johnny Depp: I once found a robin's nest in Tim Burton's hair.
- Stan: No, don't hug him Oscar! He's Hermann Göring!
- Sexpun: Oh my God, you really are a virgin!
- Stan: What, that's not good?
- Sexpun: No, it's awful.
- Scientist: You're a lunatic with the madman's dream of a milk-proof robot!!!
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